What I Go to Church For (a parody)

Oh yeah…

 

His sermons echo in my mind

I sit here praying for a sign

Over my Cappuccino froth

I gaze at this man of the cloth.

I save a space in the first pew

to get a better look at you.

My self-control was all but gone

when you read Proverbs 31

That’s what I go to church for

(though God should be the real draw)

They call me unholy

But they don’t see what I see

That’s what I go to church for

Though singing is a real chore

It’s not the Fairtrade coffee

That brings me to the sanctuary

You’re what I go to church for

You’re what I go to church for

So he may have 2 degrees

Masters in Theology

I’ve read John Stott and understood

I’d go to China if he would

I phone the church office to see

If you have time to pray with me

I catch you at the Bring and Share

You smile at me and I just stare

That’s what I go to church for

(though God should be the real draw)

They call me unholy

But they don’t see what I see

That’s what I go to church for

Though singing is a real chore

It’s not the Fairtrade coffee

That brings me to the sanctuary

You’re what I go to church for

You’re what I go to church for

A Christian man who is kind and smart with a gorgeous face, you’re a work of art.

I don’t know how you’re still not married by now

Sometimes when we share the peace

you give me a side hug and my hopes increase

I’d meet you at the vestry door

and we’ll see then just what you go to church for,

Oh, what you go to church for

I don’t want no Ben Cantelon

His songs go on and on and on

Oh if only you would see

What a perfect wife I’d be

You’re what I go to church for

The church hall is an eyesore

but you made it less painful

to pray and remain faithful

That’s what I went to church for

Tho Jesus loves me much more

I know this sounds quite cheesy

so let me ask you clearly

What do we go to church for?

What do we go to church for?

(Disclaimer: Any likeness to hot vicars, pastors or other church leaders past or present is purely coincidental, this was a homage to Busted’s What I Go to School for and nothing else.)

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